Well we’ve finally been hit with snow here in Chicago.
And I have a picture to prove it:
This cold weather always makes me want to stay indoors and get cozy with some kind of comfort food and perhaps a movie, or a nap?
Of course I had to make a stop on the way home from dropping the kids to school… my day would not be complete without a pound of chocolate! I might have one small piece… hopefully this will last for awhile, but I can’t guarantee it hehe.
Now on a more serious note…first and foremost, thank you all for sticking around another year with Hijabtrendz.
I’ve been trying to do new things and realized that it’s best to be me and do what I’ve always done around here.
So, I will be doing my best to limit the “selfies” I post. I’d rather have more thoughtful photos up, and I want to be the same genuine person I’ve been since I launched this site. And honestly, I was lost for awhile. Thanks for sticking around and helping me figure this out.
I appreciate that no one ever judged me or made mean comments, and I eventually found my way out of this sort of numbness that engulfed me. I may have posted too many pics of myself… or even tried to chunk on some makeup. Because I wanted people to enjoy Hijabtrendz. I felt that I wasn’t doing enough to get people to like the site
Maybe you didn’t notice my sporadic posting and if so, that’s awesome haha. I just lacked motivation and felt like I wanted to do something more with my life, but couldn’t figure it out (I guess I took Hijabtrendz for granted).
The last few months have been a time of transition for me. I’ve finally realized what I have in my life and how thankful I should be. I’m blessed to have a lot of things, but it can be easy to lose sight of those things when you’re chasing after other stuff.
I was feeling a bit disconnected because I wanted so badly to increase my acting potential and very seriously contemplated taking off my hijab. That made me feel like a hypocrite, because after all the site is called Hijabtrendz. I couldn’t even bring myself to write at one point. I felt like “if readers know what I’m going through right now, they’d be so disappointed in me.” And believe me I had plenty of people I talked to in person validate that. “If you take off your hijab, that’s a little weird, you run a website all about it.”
Hijab has always been my number one struggle. Which is why I started this site. Because I didn’t want people telling me what I could or couldn’t do simply because of fabric on my head. I don’t think that struggle will ever go away, or maybe it will. But it’s certainly hard when you’re not around a lot of hijabis, and in my career in particular it’s slim to none.
Plus, I was working a stressful job at the time. And I heard a comment or two about me being there for “diversity”.
That did not feel good at all.
Long story short.
I finally had enough of feeling miserable and not in control.
I decided that I wanted to be somewhere that I could love my work, grow in my career and still have time for my family.
That opportunity came and I’m so thankful for it.
I’m so happy with my career. I’m doing what I love and with plenty of time off to do other things. It’s a real blessing.
I guess the point I’m trying to reach here, is that even when you feel your having dark and gloomy days that seem they will last forever… they wont. Things happen when they’re meant to.
And sometimes that means waiting for quite awhile.
When I look back 10 years ago… I wanted so badly to work where I’m at now, but I didn’t realize that time and experience would help me get there eventually.
If someone had told me back then I’d have to wait 10 years, I would have been so impatient.
And in conclusion of this extremely wordy post…when I went to the MAS-ICNA convention and I met so many readers of this blog, it motivated me. And it reminded me why I started it all to begin with.
This is a place for us all to support one another through the good and the bad. We can share our experiences and let people know, they are not alone. Whether you’re a hijabi or not, a Muslim or not, we’re women and we do go through many of the same struggles in life.
Life is a very delicate balancing act. Sometimes it tips too far to one side and you have to try to adjust it. But that’s the way it is. It will never be perfect, and we’re not perfect, so it works! 🙂